“Industry Breathes Sigh of Relief as HBO Max Shelves Anne Frank Comedy”
HBO Max today announced cancellation of production of a concept by producer Ben Stiller and starring Larry David as Otto Frank, putting an end to what critics and audiences alike had already dubbed “history’s least necessary sitcom.”
After months of industry whispers, the streamer finally shelved the ill-fated series Upstairs, Annex, a half-hour comedy about the Frank family’s life in hiding, reimagined with laugh tracks, snappy one-liners, and what one studio insider described as “the longest, least funny episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm ever written.”
Despite a cast that included Larry David as the beleaguered patriarch, and Millie Bobby Brown rumored as Anne, the project quickly drew gasps and groans during its first table read. The writing room, stacked with “award-winning” comic talent, soon found itself trapped by the limits of good taste, as illustrated in this now-infamous script excerpt:
TABLE READ – “Upstairs, Annex”
INT. SECRET ANNEX – MORNING
ANNE (teen, hopeful):
Papa, do you think when all this is over, we can have breakfast without having to whisper?
OTTO (LARRY DAVID) (pacing, flustered):
Let me tell you something, Anne. Whispering is fine. I’ve lived with yelling, I’ve lived with silence but the whispering? It’s good for digestion. Also, why do we have to peel so many potatoes? In hiding, you’d think we’d get a pass on the potatoes.
EDITH (smiling tightly):
It’s all we have, Otto.
OTTO (LARRY DAVID) (throwing up his hands):
And every time I hide the last bit of jam, someone finds it! This attic has more detectives than all of Amsterdam!
MARGOT (reading, deadpan):
Maybe Anne can write about that in her diary: “Day 142, Papa complains about potatoes again.”
Cue awkward canned laughter. The cast exchange uncomfortable glances.
Millie Bobbie Brown (ACTOR) (breaking character, voice wavering):
Guys… I don’t think I can keep doing this.
LARRY DAVID (as himself, sighs):
“Yeah, I was all in for awkward. But this is… this is existential. Consider my enthusiasm curbed.”
Industry watchers say the production ground to a halt as even the writers, famous for making Seinfeld’s “Soup Nazi” funny, admitted defeat. Ben Stiller released a statement: “Sometimes, in pursuit of edgy comedy, you find the edge is actually a cliff. We’re sorry.”
Public response was unanimous: relief, with a side of disbelief that this ever left the pitch meeting. As one commenter put it, “Some stories should be sacred. The punchline is knowing when not to make one.”
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